Sad Story

I went to a memorial today; my friend Pat, who had responded to my invitation, sent out a couple of weeks ago, to walk in the Race for the Cure with me, had responded that if she bounced right back from "minor heart surgery" planned for the next week, she would join my group. On the day I'd hoped to hear how she was faring, I got a call from her husband to let me know that she had passed away. It wasn't the heart surgery that got her, nor the lymphoma that she had been fighting on and off over the past several years. It was scar tissue, left over from 35-year-past gall bladder surgery. The adhesion between the liver and the abdominal cavity was ruptured when she was opened for what turned out to be major heart surgery which she would have survived if her liver hadn't been torn.  Ah,  jeeze...

Every surgery is a major undertaking, a chance for something unexpected to go dreadfully wrong. That's part of what has slowed me down with my own surgical plans. I still think it's probably the right choice for me, and somehow like the associated risks better than those that go along with radiation. But cutting into flesh is profound with umpteen ways to go wrong, and some are just not obvious, like Pat's liver having been attached to her inner scar tissue instead of freely lying where it belonged. We pray we are making the right choices and then go forward and any moment could be our last. Every good day is a good day....that is my mantra. I try to find all the joy I can in each moment. Pat always made me smile; we were always laughing when we got together. I do not believe that there's a better home awaiting in the sky, I believe it is here and now and just whatever it is at this time, so perception is something I have some control over and I chose to perceive the best. Her son said that she is in a better place; I doubt it, but I am glad to have my own memories to cheer me and I'm glad he has his faith to lift him.

We are going to a classical guitar concert tonight. I'm looking forward to hearing the honest skill that will be required to make the strings sing. It's a free show at Vanderbilt's Blair School of Music-they have lots of great free shows throughout the school year. Dave is familiar with the program for tonight, having been studying the history of guitar literature with an emphasis in the Baroque period recently; I'm not particularly focused on the pieces, but the music will carry me away if it's played well and I love that transcendent feeling. And a good meal will be welcome too.