Day 4 again

Well, it's true again this time-day 4 is the doozy. Of course, I haven't gotten to day 5 yet. I don't feel terrible today, just beat, like I've got the flu or something. Tired and achy, and in and out of sleep with occasional bursts of energy and appetite. Too hot to walk the dog feeling this way, so I've given in to a total day of rest, once past the commitment to sing a couple of songs this morning at a dedication ceremony for a tree our clinic had planted in Centennial park last fall. Billy played with me and although to say that the event was lightly attended is being generous, it was a treat to get to play with him, as always. Since I returned home from that morning adventure, however, I have been laying low.

There are sensations that let you know your hair is about to come out, I've been told, and I'm having them now. I'm also coming away with a crop of hairs whenever I rub or scratch my head. The strands seem to have become more wiry than usual as they lose their hold on my scalp. My head feels like it sometimes would if I had my hair up in a ponytail for too long, like all the follicles were being pulled in the wrong direction. There is a sort of electrical buzzy feeling, and a sense that my scalp has been pulled tight. These are the sensations that I had been warned about and feeling them now makes me hope I can get someone to buzz it all off tomorrow. I've got my wig at the ready; it's time.

I've heard people compare the chemo experience to pregnancy. Since I never carried a child to term, I can't really speak to that from experience, but from what I've heard about pregnancy, it sounds similar. I've been having odd food cravings: mayonnaise, greens, avocados, watermelon....nothing too strange, and nothing I really shouldn't have, but the mayo is surprising. I'm eating a lot, and I wonder if the anti-nausea drugs work partially by increasing appetite. I've lost about 14 pounds since my diagnosis, but that will not last if this appetite keeps up. I'm not concerned about it; all I care about right now is getting good nutrition, rest, exercise, and hydration. Weight loss is my last concern at the moment. I like my body and am fine with my size.